


Alternative Vices

by deawrites



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Adult Content, Adultery, Boys Kissing, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-28
Updated: 2018-02-28
Packaged: 2019-03-25 07:10:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,160
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13829091
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deawrites/pseuds/deawrites
Summary: Alternative ending to “Jim’s Only Vice” where Leslie doesn’t smell Harvey on Jim





	Alternative Vices

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Jim’s Only Vice](https://archiveofourown.org/works/13447101) by [deawrites](https://archiveofourown.org/users/deawrites/pseuds/deawrites). 



> You don't have to read, "Jim's Only Vice" but it sure would explain a lot of what's going on in this alternate ending.
> 
> All mistakes are my own. All comments, kudos, questions and criticisms welcome.
> 
> For my wife; stick around Baby there's more to come!

Leslie heard the door from the garage into the kitchen open and she turned to look at Jim, from where she stood in the kitchen. “I’ll call you back later. He’s here.” She told her sister over the land line phone. She walked over and set the phone in it’s cradle on the wall. Jim looked like a mess, he could barely meet her gaze, she realized his eyes were red from crying and it moved her profoundly. Why was he so tormented by their attempts at trying to conceive a baby? In her heart she knew the answer of course; he didn’t want one; wasn’t ready. Yet hope still existed and she willed that not to be the case. He had been so happy when she was pregnant the last time. Leslie pulled her silk robe a little tighter around her, retied the waist belt, and slowly approached her husband.

 

“Jim?” He looked at her so morosely her heart broke for him and she couldn’t help walking forward to take him into her arms. He hugged her back, clung to her really; and she felt him burry his face against her shoulder.  “What is it? Why did you leave? Please, I want to help. Tell me what’s wrong.”

 

Jim closed his eyes and remembered all the things that Harvey had said to him at the safe house. Jim took a deep breath and squeezed her to him one final time before severing their embrace. He searched her brown eyes for unconditional acceptance and only saw curiosity, concern and fear there. She wanted desperately to understand, had even asked him herself if he didn’t want to try for another baby just that very day. Still Jim found it almost impossible to force the words out from his lips. “Things have changed.” He blurted softly surprised that he had gotten even that far. “I, I don’t think it would be good for us; you especially; for us to try and have another baby.” His gaze dropped for a second and his hands were upon her waist, the silk gripped by his fingers against her flesh. “I know you’re healthy, and I know you would do everything in your power to take care of yourself and the baby. But when I think about the possibility of losing another child,” Jim faltered and shook his head unable to continue, to say the words, ‘ _I don’t want children’_.

 

Tears trickled from Leslie’s gaze and she touched a hand to Jim’s cheek. “I know it was one of the worst times in our lives.”

 

“Leslie, we won’t survive it again. I **know** that.” Jim warned his voice strained and trembling with emotion.

 

Her thumb pressed to the center of his lips and continued, “All right then. Let’s talk about alternatives. We could adopt. There’s scores of children in Gotham in need of loving homes.” She watched Jim’s features pale and dropped her hand from his face to his chest instead. “Or do we have to have our own biological child for you to love it?”

 

Jim shook his head, wishing that he could feel Harvey’s strong hand upon his shoulder and gaze into his green eyes for a few seconds to garner support. He steeled himself and Leslie instantly responded to his tension by attempting to illicit eye contact. She said his name questioningly and Jim’ shook his head once more. “It wouldn’t matter whom the parents were.” Jim took a breath to steady his voice. “Things have changed and I, don’t think we should have children. I don’t _want_ , children. I know when we got together I told you I did, I meant it then, but now,”

 

“Things have changed.” Lee finished for him and Jim looked slightly relieved that she had said so. She felt crushing disappointment and knew it was a topic that they needed to discuss further. “Can I ask what it is that’s _changed_?” Jim nearly blanched at the question and she knew that they were at the heart of the matter. He released her from his touch and paced away a little before holding a hand out to her. She took it and he lead them to the living room where they sat down upon the couch. The shift in position reminded Jim of being back at the safe house with Harvey; physically he could still feel the other male inside of him. It was a comfort in it’s way, but also an extreme shame now that he was home with his wife.

 

“For us conceiving there would be the constant worry for your health and the baby. The fear that if we did happen to lose this one,” Jim faltered. “I’d lose you too. It nearly tore us apart last time, ended everything we’ve built together. It’s made me realize that, while you’d make the most fantastic mother, that I just don’t have it in me to be a father.”

 

“Jim,” Leslie began as she closed her hands around one of his own. “You’re a wonderful man. You are kind, compassionate, giving of yourself and your time,”

 

“Lee,” Jim interrupted squeezing her hand beneath his own to silence her. He met her gaze. “Those traits are yours, not mine. Not exactly. It doesn’t matter to me if everyone; even you; _think’s_ I’ll be a good dad, the point is I don’t **want** to be any kind of father. I’d prefer it if you and I didn’t have children.” Jim’s features and expression softened. “I’m sorry. Things changed for me and I can’t, I won’t bring a child into our lives feeling like I do.”

 

Leslie bowed her head a little forward and let go with one hand to wipe a few tears from her cheeks. She flipped her hair back with a soft shake of her head and looked at her husband once more. “I’ll need some time to get used to the new situation.” She looked back down at their union of hands. “I’m not going to tell you it won’t be difficult for me, but; I understand.” She held eye contact once more. “Thank you for being honest with me.” The last words she tripped over with her tongue, emotions clogging in her throat and Jim brought her into his arms with an uttered, ‘come here’ and embraced her. He soothed her as she cried and kissed her on top of her head.  While he felt like a colossal ass for breaking her heart, he knew it was for the greater good of their unborn or un-adopted child.

 

As the days passed things became stilted then easier between them, as Leslie processed Jim’s refusal of children. His guilt remained when ever he over heard her talking to her mother or sister about the situation, but he knew that she deserved; and needed; support from her family. He was happy however that she went back on the pill until he could make an appointment for a vasectomy. Children were not something he wanted to risk, and he agreed that it wasn’t fair that Leslie be the one that had to take the precautions, when his would be so easy to do. Just two days of discomfort and he was back to feeling himself again. He texted Harvey throughout the week of his scheduled surgery, called him when they both were at work just to hear his voice and apologize for not being able to see him that week. Harvey understood and told Jim to give him updates on his situation both at home and his health. The week without seeing Harvey depressed Jim and Leslie just read it as his upset about telling her he didn’t want children.

 

Keeping his perfect mask in place was becoming a struggle for Jim when it had once been reflexive. The more he talked to and got to know and trust Harvey, the more he wanted to make him a permanent part of his life. One telephone call near the end of his work day, Jim asked, “Would you be willing to tell a white lie for me?”

 

“Forget the color, what kind of lie are talking about?” There was little Harvey wouldn’t agree to where Jim was concerned. However, propriety dictated he at least try to show some restraint.

 

“If Leslie knows you’re my friend, that means I don’t have to lie about being with you on Thursday nights. I don’t have to leave poker games early or abstain altogether by going to Transitions. I can just meet you at the club.”

 

“And only lie to her about what you did and where you were, with me you mean?” Harvey pointed out gently. “Sure, if it makes you feel better, introduce me to her through conversation.” He knew Jim wouldn’t risk having the two of them in the same room together, so he wasn’t worried.

 

“Thank you.” Jim smiled fondly and sat back in his desk chair. “You’re going to be there this week, aren’t you?”

 

“Of course, I am. I can’t stay away from you if I tried.” Harvey reassured Jim with a laugh. “Besides I’ve been thinking about telling my family about my new best friend, Jim. You’ll be curious as to what they said won’t you?”

 

“Yes.” Jim admitted running a thumb beneath his bottom lip gently stroking. “Why do I have the feeling that it’s not exactly a ‘best friend’ relationship that you’re promoting?”

 

Harvey laughed. “Because it ain’t. I mean, they’ve been wondering why I’ve been so relaxed and happy lately. It’s because of you and they want to know who’s putting the smile on my face. Can you blame them?”

 

“Not at all. It’s also the reason I wanted to tell Leslie. She’s noticed things, subtle; but she has.”

 

“I guess we’re in agreement then.”

 

Jim smiled. “Looks like we are.”

 

Harvey looked around the bull pen then asked Jim to hang on for a second, as he rose from the chair. He walked to Interview room #2 and closed the door behind him. He then lowered his voice to further privatize their conversation. “I’ve been thinking about tying you up again. Take my time with you in doing so. Bit by bit cover you with caresses and then rope. Does that sound good to you Jim?”

 

Jim’s breathing hitched a little at the question and he closed his eyes. “Sounds like heaven. Hopefully you’ll still feel that way in a couple of days.”

 

“Don’t worry your blond little head. I’ll be so ready for it I might tackle you and drag you off to one of the rooms before you can even say hi to me.”

 

“Mmmm.” Jim purred wishfully. He opened his eyes. “Tell me more.”

 

“Would if I could Baby, but we’re at work and I can’t go back to the bull pen sporting a hard on, now can I? And how would it look if Gotham’s premier lawyer had himself a little pants situation going on while talking to a client?”

 

“As luck would have it, I’m finished for the day.”

 

“Well, I’m not and you get me so easily worked up. I can’t talk you through one right now.” Harvey pouted despondently. “But what I will do is make it up to you on Thursday.” Neither one could wait.

 

That evening over dinner Jim carefully introduced Harvey into the conversation. Asking Lee about her girl’s night out plans, then mentioning that there was a new poker player at the table. One that Jim had been getting to know and become fond of.  Leslie was excited for him as he didn’t have too many close friends past those husbands he associated with in their neighborhood click. Before Jim could interject, Leslie was planning a poker night for them to host for Jim and his new friend. To stave off more lies, Jim agreed to the idea on the condition that Leslie and the wives went out and had a good time as well. She agreed and began planning a snack menu for the gathering looking at her calendar to help Jim coordinate a feasible day. Over the next few days phone calls were made, verbal invitations were issued, and food shopped for. Everything was set into play except for Jim inviting Harvey. He was tentative about doing so, as his and Harvey’s relationship was based more on conversation and sex then it was conversation and poker. Eventually he was left with no other alternative and called Harvey to ask him to, ‘come over to his house to play’.

 

Harvey laughed hard at the invitation. He could feel Jim’s tension on the opposite side of the conversation and quieted. “Look, if you don’t want me in your house I won’t accept.”

 

“It’s not that Harvey. It’s, well; we’ve only ever really met at Transitions and, it wasn’t to play games.”

 

“Sure, it was. Just sexy ones.” Harvey teased gently. “You know me Jim. I’m not going to out us to your little group of suburbanite friends. What you and I do is for us; no one else. Agreed?”

 

“Agreed.” Jim sighed softly. “So, will you come over?”

 

“Either way I have to wait another week to see you at the club so, yeah. I’m in. I hope your buddies don’t mind losing though.”

 

“They’ll endure.” Jim predicted with a smile. “And I promise to make the night worth your while later, if you vow to do the same for me.”

 

“Such a pretty, little, bargain.” Harvey praised knowing that Jim was squirming a little at the deepening timbre of his voice. “You owe me a night of ropes and caresses.”

 

“And you’ll have it.” Jim promised breathlessly. “I’ll see you in a couple of days?”

 

“Unless something comes up, I’ll be there Jim. Don’t worry.”

 

Yet no matter how many reassurances from Harvey he received Jim couldn’t help but fret. To separate portions of his life would be colliding in the same room and he wondered what Harvey would think of Leslie; although it didn’t matter to him too much what she thought of him. Jim needn’t have worried; when the introductions were made forty-eight hours later they were short and simplistic. Leslie was on her way out, while the men were on their way in. She had just stayed long enough to make certain her guests knew where the extra food was if the snack table ran low. Once she was gone Jim’s tension relaxed within the company of the other males and Harvey watched him throughout the evening.

 

Harvey was quick to charm the others and endear himself to them. He was funny, charismatic and a challenging card player. He was easy company and Jim purposely sat across the table from him in order to force himself to behave. He was nearly vibrating out of his chair when Harvey passed behind him and brushed his fingers along the back of Jim’s nape, upon his return from the bathroom. Jim managed just not to embarrass himself by moaning at the contact. No one noticed the exchange, but Jim’s tension was palpable and mentioned by one of the other guests. Jim managed to laugh it off as shitty hand requiring him to take out a second mortgage to cover, and the game resumed as if he had never shivered noticeably at all.

 

Harvey was the last to leave, promising to accept future invitations to their game night. Once he had Jim alone he backed the younger male against the door and kissed him feverishly. Jim moaned and rubbed a leg between Harvey’s thighs, hand probing his back, arms, and hair seeking purchase as he writhed against him.

 

“I want you so much.” He groaned helplessly.

 

“We don’t have time tonight.” Harvey predicted going to work upon Jim’s throat with kisses and little nips. “I _need_ you too. Just promise me you’ll do everything in your power to get to the club sometime this week regardless.”

 

“I promise.” Jim consumed Harvey in a kiss once more, until panting; they pressed their foreheads together. “I don’t want to stop, but Leslie’ll be home any minute,”

 

“And it’ll be a little difficult to explain why we both have hard ons.” Harvey predicted stroking a thumb up Jim’s cheekbone. “I’m going.”

 

“Text me when you get home.” Jim’s breath rushed the words and Harvey withdrew from him. Harvey nodded in agreement and Jim pulled the front door open. “Bye.” He stated reaching out to hold Harvey’s hand. Harvey applied gentle pressure then released him from his grip and walked down the path to the driveway and side walk. Reluctantly Jim closed the front door and locked it, aching for Harvey’s body against his own. He was growing tired of his mask and the reasons he was wearing it, but Leslie would be home in due time and didn’t need to witness Jim’s struggle to adorn the status quo.

 

Leslie had been home for twenty minutes when Jim finally received Harvey’s text. He smiled gently to himself and sent a heart emoji in response, before putting his phone by the bed to charge. Naked from her quick shower, Leslie approached her husband and kissed him deeply in greeting. The sparkle in her chocolate brown eyes indicated that she wanted sex, and Jim kissed her and ran his hands over her lithe back. She kissed him, arms linked behind his neck. They made quick work of his clothing and soon enough he had his head between her legs. His thoughts were upon his actions and not Harvey; on his wife and not his desire for the older male. Before long Leslie was shuddering in orgasm as Jim continued his efforts to bring her pleasure.

 

Their life together was safe, comfortable; she was his, and he loved her. He ignored the vibration of his phone alerting him to a new text, as he continued to have sex with his wife. When he checked the text message in the morning he saw that it was indeed from Harvey, wishing him a pleasant sleep. The gesture warmed Jim’s chest and kept a smile upon his face every time he remembered it. Three days later he got time to see Harvey at Transitions.

 

Drawn to one another as magnets, they had kissed in greeting, and then Harvey took Jim by the hand. They wasted no time in locating a room, this time in reds with black accents. They quickly divested one another of clothing, and Harvey had Jim on his back upon the mattress and was resting atop him. As they were short on the time Jim could spend in the club this evening, Harvey adjusted his intentions of binding Jim with rope, and instead they utilized some of the many sexual aids provided in the room. A vibrator, and a very thick girthed, life like dildo. He had no complaints from Jim, who rode out every orgasm Harvey pushed him through, until he was a sweating mass of shivering goo. Jim returned the favor by using a vibrating butt plug on Harvey and fucking him hard enough to make him see other dimensions. Neither left the bed unsated, though as always Jim was reluctant to leave Harvey’s company. In the end they parted ways with a promise to meet the following week, and sooner if Jim could swing it.

 

Arriving home on a high note he kissed Leslie’s cheek and grabbed a water from the fridge. He was about to exit the kitchen when Leslie informed him that she needed to ask him about something. She took an envelop off the counter top and smiled sheepishly. “This came in our mail today and I accidentally opened it.” She held out the letter to Jim and stared down at the mailing address with fear seizing in his gut. It was from the credit card company where he had a card in his name only, that he used to pay for his Transitions dues and any added services.

 

“I was just curious as to what, V.I. North America does. You pay annually for it, and there’s a three-hundred-dollar credit on the account. What is it Jim?”

 

Leslie carefully watched Jim’s expression as he struggled desperately to compose it. He had paled in his coloring and his eyes were wide with fear. Clearing his throat, he managed to school his features into something resembling nonchalant and answered his wife. “It’s dues for a personal trainer.”

 

Leslie’s brow furrowed. “Why do you need a separate credit card account for that?” There was no accusation to her tone, merely curiosity. “You could have used any one of our cards. Are you _certain_ , that’s what the charges are for?” She arched a perfectly sculpted eyebrow at him and canted her head to one side. “What secret are you keeping from me, Jim Gordon?” She moved to run her hands up his chest and lock her wrists behind his neck. “Because, you can tell me anything and I’ll understand.”

 

Jim shook his head, gently taking her arms from around him and pushing them down to her sides. “You won’t this.” His features flushed with deep crimson. “I belong to a club.”

 

Confusion wrought Leslie’s gaze. “Club? What kind of club?”

 

“It was before I met you. From my Army days. I only keep the dues paid because they have excellent bar service and atmosphere.”

 

Leslie’s arms crossed beneath her breasts. “Okay, _again_ , what kind of club?”

 

Jim severed eye contact for a few seconds before uttering, “A sex club.”

 

This riveted Leslie’s attention focus. “What?”

 

“A sex club.” Jim took a deep breath and raised his head to look at her. “I was a single guy, I like to watch, and it seemed a good idea at the time.” He shrugged helplessly. “I never meant for you find out about it or make assumptions.”

 

Leslie blinked a few times as she considered his words and all the implications. In a surprisingly steady voice she asked, “Do you have sex with any other women while you’re there?”

 

“No.” Jim vowed in all honesty. “Never. You’re the only woman I’ve been with since Barbara.”

 

“And this place, excites you?”

 

Jim flushed and glanced away before answering, “Very much so.”

 

Leslie smiled adoringly at Jim and embraced him for a few seconds before saying, “Oh Jim, you didn’t need to hide this from me all this time.” She paused and searched his face with her gentle gaze. “I wouldn’t judge you like that, you have to know that.”

 

“I do.” He allowed accepting that he had only partially lied to her. While he hadn’t slept with other women since he met her, there had been men. Quite a few; and every one of them club patrons. And then there was Harvey. Jim’s stomach tensed, and he didn’t want to think about the Irishman right now.

 

“Then, why don’t we both go? I’ll see what it’s like and we can share an unforgettable experience.”

 

Jim felt like she had thrown icy water down over him. “Go?”

 

Leslie nodded. “We’ll make a night of it. I’ll get all dressed up nice for you,” She said running a hand down his chest as she stepped forward to embrace him once more. “We’ll have a few drinks, you’ll show me around, maybe we’ll find something else interesting to do.” Her eyes sparkled with the intent of it and Jim felt his heart beat race out of control. He wanted to flee; to shove her violently away and scream at her that Transitions was his and his alone. Yet instead all he did was agree. “Good. I think it’ll be good for us.” She kissed him lightly on the lips and turned away towards the refrigerator to withdraw a bottle of wine. She poured herself a glass. “When would you like to go?”

 

“Tomorrow night?” Jim offered past pale lips. Of course, Leslie declared that a wonderful idea and Jim spent the next half of his evening like a stunned deer in headlights in oncoming traffic. How could this have happened? Harvey wouldn’t be there; couldn’t be. Yet Jim was frightened that if he asked Harvey about the following night he would end up showing up there. On the one hand he didn’t want to risk hurting Harvey; on the other, he didn’t want to plant the seed of the idea within the other man’s brain. In the end he kept the situation to himself and prayed it wouldn’t end in disaster.

 

He signed her in as a guest. From the moment Jim stepped into the club he was like a trip wire ready to trip an explosion. He drank a few shots to at least appear calm to his wife, as he placed a hand upon her back where her backless dress revealed her skin, and paraded her around the front, and very public rooms. In contrast, she was having a wonderful time, sipping champagne, asking questions of a few of the staff and other club members. The more she opened up and explored, the greater Jim’s anxiety and anger became. By the time they were watching a threesome engage in very public erotica, Jim was furious. He wanted to leave, to never let Leslie darken the door of the club again. She had seen enough; invaded enough of his privacy. She had tainted the one place where he was free to be himself. He should have refused her entry, but he was hell bent on preserving his mask with her, and such behaviors just wouldn’t do. You don’t refuse a wife, you indulge her. Now Jim was paying a very heavy price for his masquerade.

 

“I see what you mean about voyeurism.” Leslie whispered silky and sweet into Jim’s left ear, her voice full of sexual promise. “It’s a turn on to watch them.” She nodded in the direction of the threesome and Jim gave her a faint smile of acknowledgement. The evening was proving to be his worst waking nightmare. Even more so when he ended up in a shadowed alcove taking his wife up against the wall. She was enthralled with their semi-public display and her eyes were dilated and gaze hungry. She raked her perfectly manicured nails down the back of Jim’s shirt as he kissed her neck and thrust into her. She writhed between him and the wall, encouraging him with soft moans and direction on what she wanted to feel next. When it was over, Jim composed himself and attempted to herd her out of the club and back home, but Leslie refused. She wanted to have another drink and talk to more people, to show off the state of herself now that they had engaged in sex.

 

By the time they finally did get home Jim was pensive and sullen. Leslie was too happy to notice and luckily went to sleep right away. Jim stayed down in his home office and took out his cell phone to tap a message to Harvey. He didn’t receive an answer that night and it just added to his sour mood. Instead he sat up quite late and attempted to conjure a reason why he would tell Leslie she couldn’t accompany him to the club any longer, without revealing the existence of his mask.  They ended up going two more times before he said anything, and only did so as Leslie noted his disparaging behavior.

 

“Why?”

 

“Because, it’s something that’s always been mine. A piece of me before marriage and after living at home. It represents independence to me, and I’ve enjoyed drinking there for years. I don’t want to stop, but it’s just something I don’t feel I can share with anyone else in my life. It’s just for _me_.”

 

He knew the reasoning was faulty; ridiculous; but he professed it anyway and Leslie accepted it at face value. Immense relief washed over him, and he embraced her. They kissed, and she asked if they could do something similar that they had done at the club, in another upscale bar. He would arrive first, she would follow. They would talk to one another as if they were strangers, then they could find somewhere semi-private to have a quick round of sex. Jim readily agreed knowing that role play was something in his sexual wheel house he could explore with her.  From there she admitted to other fantasies and eagerly Jim listened, finding nothing that he couldn’t or was unwilling to provide for her. Her tastes were acceptable, and she was gleeful that he was so understanding of her needs. They made love and Jim texted a date and time for Harvey to meet him at the club.

 

Several days later, Harvey arrived ten minutes late; but he arrived. His gaze was full of predatory intent and Jim shivered at the sight of it. He wanted Harvey to do whatever it was that was currently in his mind regarding Jim: Every bit of it. They didn’t say a word to one another and kissed passionately instead. Once parted, Harvey growled in Jim’s ear, “I asked for the Red room. It’s time I tie you up like I promised.”

 

Jim shuddered within Harvey’s arms and breathed a response against the other man’s throat. “As tight as I can handle. I’m yours for the night.”

 

Harvey uttered that he was and smacked Jim hard upon the behind once. “Let’s go Junior. Time’s a wasting.”

 

It wasn’t long before they both were naked, Jim laying back upon red satiny sheets, while Harvey began to kiss and caress his skin, a bundle of rope resting on the bed alongside of Jim and a knife to cut it with.

 

“I’ve been reading about knots and bondage styles.” Harvey informed Jim breathy as the younger male pushed up against him, eyes wide and willing. “Saw a few ‘how to’ videos as well. I’ve learned a few things I think you’re going to like.” A grin slowly spread across his face. “Still the same safe word?” Jim nodded. “Good.” He kissed Jim possessively and reached for the rope.

 

It had gotten difficult to breathe, but not enough that he couldn’t get past the panic and relax. He was getting just enough oxygen and he trusted Harvey implicitly. Perhaps even loved him. Jim knew that he was placing himself entirely into another person’s hands and that was more terrifying than even the obstruction of his breathing rhythms. Yet it was also the surrender of control that granted him the most release and carried him through the haze of falsehoods to the core of his truth. It transcended the barriers of his façade and compelled his soul to keep breathing when all external forces wished him to do was conform. Inch by inch, knot by knot, the pressure ratcheted down the length of Jim’s body until the only thing he could move was his head a little from side to side. He was completely incased in rope, and any patches of flesh still showing Harvey kissed and nipped at, promising he would have left marks there but for the fact that Jim couldn’t explain their appearance when he returned home.  Jim wanted them anyway. Said as much, yet Harvey refused him because he could think logically and beyond the moment while Jim could not.

 

There were tears upon Jim’s cheeks when he finally came; Harvey having unbound his cock long enough to permit the action beneath his hand, mouth and tongue. Jim was exhausted after the session and once he was slowly disentangled from the ropes he clung to Harvey and nuzzled against him.

 

“That was,” Jim couldn’t think of a word that best described how he felt so he kissed Harvey instead.

 

Harvey chuckled when it severed. “I’m glad you liked it. Sounded like you needed it desperately.”

 

Jim nodded. “Leslie is making things difficult.” He swallowed preparing to tell Harvey about her insistence that he bring her to the club and what a coward he had been in not telling her no, for three visits.

 

“You mean how she showed up with you in the club?”

 

Jim’s gaze widened in surprise. “You knew?”

 

Harvey nodded. “I was here one night you brought her. I kept away from you two; left as soon as I saw you; because I didn’t want us all to cross paths.”

 

Jim smiled softly with gratitude and leaned up to kiss Harvey once more. “Thank you.”

 

“No problem.” His smile faded. “Besides, I was jealous as fuck and knew that a confrontation was the last thing any of us needed. I was dying to ask you about it several times, but I chickened out at the last minute.” Jim stroked a hand down Harvey’s cheek and then launched into an explanation of both how the situation came to be, as well as his fury regarding it. Harvey settled down alongside Jim and stroked his chest with a hand. “Looks like I wasn’t the only coward. If you felt that strongly about it, why couldn’t you do what I didn’t do and just confront her?”

 

Jim laughed a little. “Because then she would question why, and I’d have to tell her about us.” Jim partially shrugged. “I don’t lie to her when I can help it.”

 

“Me either.” Harvey teased lightly of a very serious situation and Jim’s gaze reflected that he accepted it. “That said, I would like to see you a little more than we have been. I was thinking that maybe we could meet outside the club every once and a while?”

 

Jim’s smile returned. “What are you doing for lunch tomorrow?”

 

“Whatever it is you want me to be doing.”

 

“Good. Then have it with me.”

 

“Well, I know a quiet little place that’s not too far from where I work. The food is good, and the service is impeccable. Ever eaten at Le Chez Doris’?”

 

“French food.” Jim laughed pressing tighter against Harvey. “I’m in. What time?”

 

“It’s more of American cuisine, you know, like at a diner. One sound good to you?”

 

“Perfect. And I’ll even leave a little time for _dessert_.”

 

“Mmm, dessert.” Harvey kissed Jim softly. “My favorite.”

 

Jim kissed Harvey in return. “Mine too.”

 

They began meeting for lunch daily should their schedules permit. Sometimes meeting for breakfast if they hadn’t been to lunch. Sometimes they ate, sometimes they went to the club or Harvey’s apartment to have sex instead. Every time they talked about themselves, their values and opinions. They told one another stories of their lives and about their ambitions. In Jim’s case he wanted to be the district attorney for Gotham City and for Harvey a promotion to Captain some day would please him. At his age he wasn’t as focused vocationally as Jim was, and would settle for riding out the short span of years it would take him to get to his pension pay out. Jim often teased him he should be setting his sights on police commissioner instead. Harvey taunted back, if that was the case then Jim should try to be governor of the state, or at the very least mayor of Gotham by the time he was in Harvey’s age bracket.

 

When they weren’t physically seeing one another, Jim texted or called Harvey. The action became so habitual that Leslie would smile to herself as she cooked dinner and watched Jim ‘play’ with his friend. That was until she started noticing things about their relationship. How Jim’s face lit up every time Harvey called or answered a text. How readily he jumped at any suggestion of including the man in his boys’ night out. How eagerly he counted the days to such times that he would see Harvey. He discouraged her from inviting Harvey to dinner unless other couples were in attendance. Other behaviors began to shift as well. In subtle ways but Leslie noticed. Jim was quicker to anger than he had been previously. He seemed resentful if their plans changed or if she questioned him about any time he spent at Transitions. While she didn’t broach the subject of adoption again, she did ask him if they could get a pet of some kind, yet he felt they shouldn’t with their current schedules; that it wouldn’t be fair to the poor animal. In the end Leslie agreed and watched her husband closely.

 

The problem reached a head when he began to slag off having sex with her most nights. He was tired or a myriad of other excuses. The truth of the matter was that he was no longer interested. Leslie; not one to be quiet about her thoughts and emotions; elected to question him about it. She challenged that perhaps he was doing more at the sex club than merely drinking and taking in the atmosphere. She saw the truth of it flash behind his gaze and asked him point blank if he were having an affair. Jim blushed, his mouth tightened into a fine line and she told him not to bother answering; she already knew that he was.

 

“Who is she?”

 

Anger twisted Jim’s features to match her own emotional level. “I told you, I haven’t been with another woman since I met you.”

 

“But you’re having an affair!” She accused as slowly the realization seeped into her conscious mind. “Are you implying that you’re fucking a _man_?”

 

Jim’s spine straightened. “Yes. That’s exactly what I’m inferring.”

 

“Why, Jim? Why would you go to someone other than your wife for attention?”

 

“Because.” Jim stated squaring off in his stance. “He takes care of me. I don’t have to take the lead; make any decisions; do anything I don’t want to or am not capable of. He makes me happy.”

 

Leslie’s features crumbled towards tears. “Don’t I?”

 

Jim’s left cheek twitched, his jaw tightening. “Not the way he does. What you and I have is different. It’s like comparing cars to horses.”

 

“And in your analogy which am I Jim?”

 

“It doesn’t matter.”

 

“It does to **me**!” Leslie pressed a hand to her own chest. “Tell me who it is Jim; who are you sleeping with?”

 

“That’s mine. Not yours, or anyone else’s.”

 

“Don’t you **dare** play that game with me.” Leslie demanded anger flaring in her features. “The club, the reason you didn’t want me to go was because you met him there, didn’t you?” She accused rather than asked.

 

“Yes. But you’re wrong. It wasn’t just because I met him at the club. I want and _need_ something that’s **mine** ; separate from what I have with you.”

 

“So, you think having an affair is the way to get it?” Leslie shrieked at him bitterly. “Do you honestly believe that now I know this that I’ll say, ‘okay. Keep going to him, I don’t mind as long as you come home to me at the end of the night’?”

 

“Of course not. I just never intended for you to find out.”

 

Leslie huffed angrily and pressed the fingertips of her right hand to her forehead. “You think I’m that stupid, Jim? We’re _married_. If you were lacking something you were supposed to _tell_ me. Come to _me_ and I would do whatever it is you need me to do.”

 

Jim shook his head. “You can’t do what he does. No one can. Just him.”

 

Tears flooded Leslie’s brown eyes. “And just what is **that** exactly?” She crossed her arms beneath her breasts.

 

“He frees me.”

 

“Frees you? From what Jim? Your _horrible_ marriage? Any responsibility to that same bond?”

 

“I can be who I really am with him.”

 

“Tell me what it is you need Jim and I can make you feel free too; perhaps better than he ever can!” She pressed her palms to her chest in emphasis, gaze and expression begging Jim to remain with her.

 

Jim shook his head, voice clogged with emotion. “I’m sorry Leslie. You don’t want who I am, you want the man I show you; a mask and not the **real** me.”

 

“You’re being horrifically unfair to me Jim. You can’t just pronounce that I don’t even know you without showing me who you truly are. Why does that man get to see ‘the real you’ and I don’t? What’s so special about _him_ that you trust him over your own wife of ten years?”

 

The answer hit Jim abruptly and his gaze tinged with unshed tears. “I’m in love with him.”

 

They argued for the next hour and forty minutes, going around and around about what it was that Jim needed that Harvey could provide that Leslie hadn’t been given the chance too. She fought for him, made promises and agreed to give them a chance if he would just open to her. Yet the more she pleaded, struggled and cried the more stoic Jim became. He shut down and, in the end, Leslie gave up arguing with him. She asked him to leave for the night; to go anywhere but stay at their home and Jim obliged. He went straight to Harvey’s apartment and knocked on the door, suitcase in hand and an athletic bag over his shoulder. Harvey’s shocked expression greeting him on the opposite side of the door.

 

“Jim?”

 

“Can I stay the night Harvey? I know this is short not,”

 

“Come in!” Harvey grabbed for Jim’s suitcase then stood back from the door allowing him entry. “What happened?”

 

“Leslie knows about us.” Was the quickest answer that Jim could grant and Harvey nodded as he closed the front door and locked it.

 

“So, she tossed you out?”

 

Jim shrugged. “We argued for a while. There’s more for her to say but, I know what I feel.” He set his other bag down upon the floor and looked at Harvey. “My marriage is over.”

 

Jim watched Harvey’s expression flush a little, and he sounded slightly breathless when he asked, “Are we?”

 

“No. Of course not.” Jim permitted with a tender smile. “I was hoping that you would let me stay a couple of nights until,”

 

“No until.” Harvey interrupted once more. “Stay here as long as you’d like. I want you here.”

 

Jim’s smile widened, and he moved forward, placed one hand upon the back of Harvey’s neck and the opposite arm he encircled around him. He leaned in for a passionate kiss and Harvey responded in kind, embracing Jim within his own arms. Several minutes passed as they kissed and finally once they severed Jim whispered, “I love you.”

 

Gaze locked upon Jim’s, Harvey smiled slow and his eyes glistened with emotion and he answered in kind. “I love you too. You don’t know how long I’ve waited for you to tell me that.”

 

“After I unpack, why don’t you tell me?” Jim leaned into another kiss and it was going to be some time before he did take his belongings out of his suitcase. For now he was far too busy showing Harvey just how much he loved him.


End file.
